The Baby's Baby

With the exception of Kid 5, none of my children expressed an interest in having a younger sibling.  It's ironic since she's my only child who isn't going to have one.  She's consistently asked for a baby brother or sister for about the last year and a half. Last year, around Christmastime, she said, "Do you know what I want for Christmas?"  Due to the plethora of toy commercials on television I envisioned her asking for a remote control helicopter or Playfoam.  Without hesitation, she said, "I just want - A PONY!  And a baby brother."  

When I told her no and to pick something else, she, of course, asked why.  I told her we didn't have room for either.  She responded that babies don't take up that much room and they aren't hard to take care of.  I told her that her opinion will surely change upon the birth of her first child.  

Because Kid 5 has been denied the one thing she truly wants, she is obsessed with baby dolls.  I swear, they multiply by the hour.  She has all types; big ones, small ones, white ones, black ones, Asian ones, bald ones and ones with hair that look like a rat lives somewhere on their head.  She has one that has eyes that are far to big for it's head that I refused to buy her because it was so creepy.  She conned Daddy into buying it for her.  I forgot to send him the memo.  

There is one doll in particular that is by far her favorite.  It's about the size of a three month old baby and is fairly realistic. Kid 5 found some old baby clothes that are size 0-3 months and they fit the doll perfectly.  She does not have a name for the doll, but simply calls her "Baby."  Baby goes everywhere with us; Walmart, Chi Chi's, Five Guys, Trader Joe's, and Kohls.  She sits in shopping carts and in highchairs albeit a bit wonky.  Kid 5 never wants to leave Baby in the car and there are times when I really wish she would.  

Baby looks so realistic that people think she's real.  I get dirty looks from moms, dads, grandmas, grandpas, and store employees.  There was a lady at Trader Joe's who began to yell at me because Baby wasn't wearing a hat and socks and wasn't wrapped in a blanket before she realized the doll wasn't real. I've almost gotten accustomed to the narrowed eyes and shake of the head as people eye the bald pink little almost-person slumped in my shopping cart.  I've lost count of how many times I've heard, "Oh my god, I thought that doll was real.  I couldn't believe you'd let your little girl carry your baby like that."  I'm just waiting for the day that someone calls the cops.  

For now, Kid 5 totes Baby around everywhere.  I wait patiently while she wraps her in a blanket and puts her to bed or buckles her into a seat belt in the car.  And I take pictures. Because I have to remind her when she has her own baby how easy it was back then.  

Ready for bed

 

Grandpa with Baby and Jacob